Halloweenie

Every year in Dallas we have a street party spanning three city blocks in a colorful part of town where otherwise unacceptable costumes are par for the course.  I felt completely comfortable donning my six-foot penis outfit from Spirit Halloween Superstores amidst thousands of people.

Overall the event was a major success.  Graham handed out hundreds of cards as I walked around posing for pictures with numerous people - too many to count.  Paul moved us through the crowd for maximum visibility.  There were the usual predictable conversations/groping from half-drunk revelers of both sexes, along with a few serious conversations (none of which were held by me as I could barely see out of the costume, much less converse with anyone effectively).

I did find out one very important thing.  Dressing up in a penis costume holding a sign saying "Uncut?  Lucky Stiff!" will attract some attention, but a dancing penis with a sign over one's head moving with the beat of the music will get you ten times as much attention.  Note: Anyone, male or female, can wear one of these costumes.  The only negative feedback I heard was from one couple saying the intact penis "wasn't kosher."  Everybody else was accepting of our message or didn't bother arguing the point.

The best part of the evening was the costume contest, where we got to strut down the center of the street which was cordoned off by barriers.  After the emcee introduced us, he asked the crowd over the loudspeakers if anyone there that night was "uncut."  Several hands went up in the crowd, apparently proud of their condition.  I wonder what impact that simple gesture had on others in the crowd.  We then walked down the "runway" and went home very, very tired.

Update: As I found out almost by accident, a state-wide gay issues magazine included my costume on their Halloween page, complete with sign.  How much did all this exposure cost including costume and cards?  Less than $50.

2005 Update: We went to the Halloween parade again this year, got seen and  photographed by tons of people, and got to walk down the runway again.  Attendees loved the costume, which this year was an inflatable version and was again less than $50.

2006 Update:  We printed several hundred cards this year and still we managed to run out.  This year both Graham and I dressed up as penes for twice the intact impact.  I saw another reveler dress in the exact same costume, whom I excitedly hugged with cries of "Brother!"  At the end of the evening, the batteries in Graham's inflatable costume started to weaken and his outfit lost some of its... "oomph."  Luckily, two young women dressed as "Levitra" and "Viagra," respectively, rushed to his aid.  (No, I'm not making this up.  There is a photo out there somewhere.)

2007 Update:  I could not attend the 2007 parade, as we were demonstrating outside the annual AAP convention in San Francisco at the time.  We'll be back next year, barring similar conflicts!

2008 Update: I had a chance to go overseas for my birthday and I took it.  :-)  Sorry!

2009 Update: The only thing that will keep me away this year would be a demonstration at the AAP.  Barring that, "I'll be there with b*lls on."

2010 Update: Talk about a good sport...  My friend surprised me by agreeing to my last-minute request to go to the parade.  Tons of people wanted photos of the costume and the sign, many of which will show up on their Facebook pages, where all their friends will see them and see the message.
I didn't have time to print out information cards to hand out this year.  Shortly after arriving at the parade, a man became visibly upset with me, perhaps thinking I was devaluing him.  :-(  Mental note: Always have 3x5 cards when you dress up like a penis so people know where you're coming from.
Halfway through our time there, I heard someone shout out my friend's name.  I immediately pretended not to be with her, not wanting to embarrass her in front of her friends.  What did I see when I turned to look?  Of the thousands of people there, she was talking to the only other person there dressed like a penis.  :-)


Take the Whole Baby Home